Should or Shouldn't I?

I am back. I am debating, though now that I brought it up I really should write on it, whether to weigh in on the whole Terri Schiavo or not. By bringing it up, I proved that I really had settled the debate in my head. But I feel better trying to "show" that I had at least considered letting it be. It is no Michael Jackson thing, there are no freaks here.

Let me start with this, I like to think I am softening the coldness of my opinion but I do not think this is an issue where there is any softness, I find the situation very sad for all those involved. I am not unsympathetic to her parents, there you can see on which side of the fence I tend to sit, but what kind of life was it?

Keep in mind as I write this Terri Schiavo has died. I ask the question was it a life? I know that she was breathing but was she LIVING? It does go to the notion of sentience, was is basically being aware of your surroundings and feeling and responding to sensory stimuli. I saw nothing in any of the videos that would lead me to believe that she was sentient.

I know that numerous "doctors" have seen the video and concluded otherwise. Let me ask you would accept a diagnosis from ANY doctor who only saw you on video tape? If your answer is a truthful "yes" then I guess you would be inclined to see Dr Nick Riviera from The Simpsons. The credibility of those diagnoses is laughable. Again, I am not a doctor but I could play one on TV. That is what these "doctors" have been doing in this case.

The best thing that I read, from a neurologist who may have examined Terri Schiavo or has at least seen similar cases (isn't funny how these things turn patients or people into "cases", I guess it is a nice way of dehumanizing something so tragic that we do not want to even go to that dark place where we imagine ourselves in the same situation, on either side of the bed, but I digress), and he hit the nail on the head. He has seen these situations and it is only natural, as compassionate and thoughtful human beings, to want to see the flickers of life in her. You want to believe that any motion or spontaneous movement has meaning and thus proves that she is sentient and that there is SOME quality of life. You have to look at the patient and the video and filter out that natural bias of the observer and just OBSERVE the context, the stimuli and the response, if any.

I have not seen much evidence of that truly clinical and OBJECTIVE analysis of the videos by any of these medical professionals (?) on TV. They are just perverting scientific method and misusing their credibility, which has been lost in my eyes for what it is worth, to push a political, religious or moral point of view.

I think that I like these sort of issues because they fall so neatly into the gray and ambiguous area of life. It is such a nuanced situation with a myriad of opinions and views. I think there are many good points raised by people on both sides of the issue. That is what makes it all the more tragic, there is no easy, clean and neat solution. It is just like life. There are no clean lives. We all live messy, convoluted, ambiguous lives. It is truly uplifting because we, here in the industrialized world, can really create our own identities and lives. I guess some recreate or even steal others identities, welcome to the Internet. Anybody want to go phishing? I digress again.

I have disliked the way that Michael Schiavo has been portrayed like something akin to Scott Petersen or is that Peterson, either way he is a dead man, which is not the worst thing in the world but that is an issue for another day. I really have to feel for him. It i s not easy to come to the cold conclusion that your wife is "dead" only her body, the machine, does not seem to want to stop working. It is easier to characterize him in the negative and really look to some "motive" other than compassion as to why he would want to see his wife die. It is easy to assume that he stands to gain financially (though there really has not been any EVIDENCE of that), emotionally (he does have a fiance and two young children with her while "married" to Terri) or other such thing. Why not just divorce her and let her family or the State to deal with her care? I can understand all the sniping towards him, I really can. Those attacking him believe that they are putting themselves into Terri's shoes. This is how they would "think" and "feel" if they were Terri.

It is all false. They are thinking like themselves in a different situation. Could they have thought like Terri when she was sentient, I am making a conclusion of fact there but it is all on the basis of hearsay)? I would say the answer is "no". The mistake being made is that they HAVE to think like Terri, not just substitue what they "think" they would feel or think. There is a big difference. The major one being it is always very easy to opine in the abstract. It is quite another to act and react when the "bullets start flying". When the adrenaline and emotions hit, what you do or think could be completely different from what you thought you would do in the abstract. Reality is funny that way. The point I am trying to make is that we assume that everybody thinks the way we do. Is that assumption true, I do not think so because if people have different experiences or contexts, then it is unlikely that their thinking will be the same. It could be but it is not necessarily true, coincidental.

I can see a Micahael Schiavo who loved his wife, who really did hear her say that she did not want to live like she was living, if it should come to that, who was looking to carry out her wishes (over 15 years). As a society, laws were created to deal with who is the next of kin and best placed to make sure a persons wishes were carried out. This responibility rests with the spouse. The courts have been clear on that so why has the State seen fit to try to abrogate the laws, it itself, put in place. I should say that the "next of kin" thing implies the absence of bad faith on the part of the party asserting control. I think that with over 18 court decisions in his favor, Michael Schiavo deserves the benefit of the doubt.

So now we are left with the husband not being evil. Here is the painful part, we are left with a women who is not (and has not been for 15 years) sentient, left clinging to "life" (?) for what reason? That is the tragedy.

I think that I have bored all you enough. It was not much of a rant or rave. I did not get into the starvation thing, but suffice it to say, if thought about in the guise of somebody who is not sentient, does it really matter? Is it really cruel in that circumstance? Is it any worse than not actively putting her out of her misery? We humanely put down sick animals but we agonized over letting Terri Schiavo starve to death (dehydration really) but "could" do nothing to ease what we see as a miserable death? That is the question that I will leave you all with today. Ciao.

I promise to funnier next time out but I am showing my versatility.

I am pissed

I am back. I spent some good time yesterday going on a Michael Jackson rant and somehow, through the magic of technology, the posting was "lost". The saddest part was that in terms of typing my rant, I actually thought I had said something profound about life. Oh well, that pearl of wisdom has sunk to the bottom of the insanity well. It may appear again but there are no guarantees, except of course, death and taxes. I was thinking that the two could be combined into death taxes but that would be the ultimate indignity. I mean being able to "tax" an truly involuntary and inevitable event. Of course, up here they do have a death tax, except it is called a probate fee. Fee, tax, if the government, that nameless, faceless and actually senseless entity, gets (or is that takes) the money, what is the difference what it is characterized as?

If I recall correctly, I was not really ranting on Michael Jackson for his alleged actions. It was more his dumbass statement on Jesse Jackson's radio show (I find that idea pretty funny as well). He had the nerve to compare himself and his situation with Nelson Mandela and Muhammed Ali. Is this person so out of touch? The answer is obviously "YES" or does a chicken got lips?

Let me start with this. Michael Jackson is a freak. I do not put much value on the word. It is neither good nor bad, it just is. He is a freak. There is NOTHING wrong or illegal about being a freak. In fact, he may be a freak with too much money, though he is a freak with far less money than he once had or will have once his court ordeal is completed. You got to love the lawyers. I am damn proud of my profession on this one. It is his break with reality that gets me.

That assumes that he broke with reality. That assumption is questionable. I mean think about him in the 80s with the single glove and Emmanuel Lewis and Bubbles. He just seemed harmless then. The the numerous plastic surgeries. That is freaky but he was hurting nobody but himself, which is his right as a person.............and freak.

Now back in 1993 or so, he pays $26 Million to make a molestation accusation go away. Again, that is what it is. Now here we are in 2005, and he is facing charges for a similar incident. I am not sure where his claims of racism come in. I mean what race is he exactly these days?

The thing that galled me was that he compared himself to Nelson Mandela and Muhammed Ali. Both of those men were victims of charges heavily coated in racism. Yet, both of those men "suffered" with dignity. They made their choices and lived with the consequences of their actions. I have not seen any evidence of Michael Jackson doing that. Racist charges and witch hunt indeed.

If he had any sense, he would be able to see how his actions could be perceived. Yet, all he does is proclaim how he cannot see anything wrong with the situation. HELLO! REALITY CHECK TIME!!!!

His actions do not excuse the parents of any boys that have been left in Michael Jackson's care to sleep with him in his bed. What are these parents thinking? Is it a source of pride to be able to say that your son was diddled or molested, I do prefer the sound of the word "diddled", by Michael Jackson? Am I alone here? Why do you need a license to drive a car, but any mental defective can become a parent, assuming fertility?

I am not advocating the State step in and license children, believe me. To paraphrase PJ O'Rourke, the state had enough trouble delivering the mail, and our addresses were on it, so why should or could it be entrusted to licence parenthood. In fact, in Canada, the way the Liberal government spent OUR money on themselves was and is truly criminal. If they can use the treasury like a Banana Republic, the least they could have done was at least buy some really good, hot weather. But no, they bought Jean Chretien signature golf balls. Sorry that is a rant for another day.

Back to Michael Jackson. When he can face the consequences of his choices with dignity, then he can compare himself to those two other men. He cannot seem to see what is wrong with what he does or did. That is the major problem here. Until he is imbued with some common sense, he is going to feel justified to blame anybody and anything but himself.

That is all for today. I still think that yesterday's rant was more cogent and funnier but this is the best that I can do right now. I mean just typing Michael Jackson's name makes me feel the need to wash my hands and disinfect my keyboard. Ciao.

Happy Good Friday to all!

I am back. I am not sure as to why I enjoy beginning each post that way, but I do. Besides, I am still unsure any of this is being read so in some ways it is like talking to myself. I do not mind doing that except I have this annoying habit of finishing my own sentences. It is as if I can anticipate everything that I want to say. I should seek help with that problem, only I think that I have been known to interupt and finish other people's sentences.

I keep thinking that if I stare at this screen and keyboard long enough, something profound will spring to mind. Boy, have I been wrong about that. In my sop to the NCAA Tournament, I enjoyed last night's games. Being Canadian and not going to any US college for school, I can pick and choose, not that anybody else could not, any schools that I like or have some, no matter how tenuous, connection to. It is with that in mind that two of my hopefuls in remaining in the tournament won last night. I have family, my late father's late uncle (and people wonder why I have punctuality issues--my whole family seems to be late so why shouldn't I?) and a cousin, who we believe is still alive, but I have not heard a thing about him since at least my wedding in 1993, live(d) in Morgantown, WV. That is where the campus of West Virginia University is located. Though, I have not been down that way since 1977, I was sort of taken by the place. The mountainous area and the monorail were cool in a late 70s view of the "future" sort of way. It reminds me of the future according to Disney at Epcot. It was something back in the 70s but as future becomes present, it makes me want to smack my forehead and ask "what were we thinking?"

There, in a roundabout way, I am supporting WVU. Go Mountaineers! In 1984, during our Reading Week, some frat brothers and I (Pi Lambda Phi, for those keeping score, Canada Kappa chapter) road tripped down to scenic Champagne-Urbana, IL and the University of Illinois. It was February and on the Sunday, the day we departed, hungover, sleep deprived and trashed (though I was driving as it was my father's car-the two toned early 80s Grand Prix with 8 cylinders of GM power) we took in an Illinois-Iowa basketball game. I do recall Illinois winning and it was a fun game to witness. Because of that, I am a fan of the Fightin' Illini. They won last night, so Go Illini!

I have nothing against Duke. I do like the tradition of North Carolina (the number of players and coaches that came up through Dean Smith's program over the years is a testament to his teachings of the game and recruiting skills. I think that with Roy Williams at the helm, a student of Smith's, the tradition lives on). I am also a UConn fan. I have been disappointed too often by Syracuse and any Pac10 team, though Arizona lives on, to ever put my money on them. I also think that Rick Pitino is a hell of a college coach. I thought that about Larry Brown too (a UNC alumnus) in both his college and professional coaching careers.

I guess that I really have nothing profound or funny to say right now. Yet it has not stopped me from typing whatever is on my mind. At least it is not me wondering what I will be having for dinner tonight or trying to remember what I ate last night. I am sure that has meaning to anybody reading. If I write about that, I guess I should just get a webcam and you can watch my daily life. I wonder how many people I could bore to death with the minutiae of my life. Step right up! See the Well Adjusted Madman brush his teeth! Marvel in the excitement of flossing! Good oral hygiene must be important in the world of ranting and raving! Look he is reading the newspaper! How exciting! I could have all these hours of "tape" and could edit it down to a great reality show. Somebody forward me Mark Burnett's number, I have a proposal for him. Fuck Martha Stewart, it is time for a Madman, just not CNBC's James Cramer, even I am finding his yelling too much.

I think that I have had enough for this moment. I hope you enjoyed today's bit of nothingness. Oh yeah, Barney Martin died. He was 82. He played Jerry Seinfeld's father, Morty, on Seinfeld. That is too bad, but it to is life! Ciao!

Isn't it odd?

I am back but I will be short. I have been reading the news and perusing the headlines. I was struck that the Arab League, it makes them sound like superheroes except for their backward thinking and lack of DOING anything heroic, have been meeting. The upshot of this meeting is that they "expect" concessions from Israel before they will recognize her right to exist. Of course, this presupposes the more than 55 year existence of Israel with or without their official or de jure recognition. I was struck by something so absurd. It is as if these conferences and their "official" governments were written by the boys at Monte Python. Anyway, I was thinking about one of the impediments to democracy in the Arab World. They have come out and linked the freedom of their own people to that of the Palestinians.

If I am living in one of these nations I have to think, "what the hell does the alleged oppression of the Palestinians by some other nation have to do with my freedoms at home?" That is the issue and it is absurd. Of course, the answer is much more simple, sinister and beautiful. It does allow for a blame Israel mind set to their own oppression at home. The only problem is that the linkage is so absurd that could you believe for a moment that even if Israel were to acquiesce to ALL of their demands (and ceases to exist) they would give their people the promised freedom. The answer has to be "NO" because it is the story of power and the absolute corruption of absolute power.

I know that there was little humor here today, but it had to be said. I hope I provoked thought. Ciao.

Just a story to share

I am back. I have a story to share that is culled from my reality. My in laws are lovely people. They are clinically insane, but very nice folk. About five years ago, my father in law underwent colon reattachment surgery. I always found that term "colon reattachment" surgery to be rather Orwellian. It fails to convey the reality of having the colon detached surgically before the surgeon reattached the colon. That is just me. Anyway, they had been, his proctologist actually, had been moving further up his colon to remove polyps. Aren't you glad that you still are reading. There is a point and story with humor (humour to my Canadian friends) here but I have to set it up. As I do, I am finding the situation funny but uncomfortable so I keep fidgetting in my chair.

The set up point is that my father in law has some colon issues that are quite apparent. Pity my wife as she will need to start going for regular colonoscopies in the near future. At least it is not me. I know that is rather callous but it is true. If i could not feel her pain during child birth, then I realize that I am truly incapable of sympathetic pain. In fact, when she was pregnant, for every pound that she gained, I think I lost a pound. It was a good thing that she did not put on much weight because I would have withered to nothing. Imagine telling the baby that his father was that emaciated rake in the corner. Of course, given my later father's and my present brother's build, it would be seen as genetic.

Anyway, keep the colon thing in mind and consider that I have been having dinners on Friday with my in laws for over seventeen years. In all that time, I have not known my mother in law to make vegetables. She seems to consider pickles, because they are green, to suffice. In fact, when she does make a vegetable, it is made in pudding form. You should not know that it was once a vegetable. She will serve four different kinds of meat but no vegetables. If I had to put her meals to color, gray is the color of dinner there. I mean with that lack of fiber in his diet, it is no wonder they are removing polyps left and right from his colon.

We are over at their place on Christmas Day, 2003. My wife and I go out to find a Chinese restaurant to pick up dinner. We find an authentic one nearby their house. I know it to be authtentic as we were the only Caucasians in the restaurant. One of the dishes we bought was sauteed vegetables.

My father in law opens the container with vegetables and exclaims in wonder, "What do you call this stuff?" I turn to my wife and say, they are mixed vegetables. He then chimes in, "I've never seen anything like this!" At which point I have to shake my head and say, "I have been eating here for fifteen years, I know for a fact that you have never seen anything like that here."

Then they all seem to wonder why he polyps and needed the colon reattachment surgery. I have continued to tease my mother in law about it and the lack of vegetables. Her pat answer is that she never had vegetables growing up or made them as an adult. Broccoli is a foreign body in that household, though she did once use it in some sort of noodle pudding. It was overcooked and looked gray, so it may have been some sort of meat for all I really know.

The only puddings I like are chocolate and rice, and not necessarily together. I wondered what the vegetables did her that she would treat them that way. I could say that I wonder what we did to have food like served to us, but that would be mean. It may be truthful, though.

I do wonder how she avoids the vegetables in the produce section of her local supermarket. The layout is such that the entrance is in the produce area. Does she put on a blindfold so as to avoid an greens? I cannot fathom the whole scene. I mean she is a well read woman but somehow the connection between a lack of fiber, the fiber, nutrition and phytochemicals in vegetables, and such has not seemed to filter into head. Perhaps, she is just afraid of them. I wonder if as a child she was attacked by some Swiss chard. That is right, I am blaming it on the Swiss, now!

I want to thank you all for this forum. You have helped me solve a mystery. It is all the fault of the Swiss.

That is all for today, ciao to y'all.

Just an Observation

I am back. I was just pondering the verdict of not guilty in the Robert Blake case in California. I was struck by something. It seems to me, and I know the sample size is small, that if you are a third rate actor that it is "legal" to murder your spouse, or ex-spouse, in California. I come to that conclusion, not on the basis of the evidence, but given OJ Simpson and this case. It is kind of funny, in a sad sort of way, but if you are married to a has been actor, I would be very careful.

Now we have the spectre of Phil Spector to watch. If he is not convicted, I will have to broaden my theory to include celebrities killing "nobody" type actresses as being permissible in California. Is this a question of having the right to own firearms without having the responsibility of respecting them and the damage that they can cause? Though, OJ had the good sense to slash his way to a successful kill. (Is it really good sense? I do not know but he did get away with it, at least at his criminal trial. I do wish him luck on his decade long quest to "find" the killer of Nicole Simpson and Goldman.)

That is all I want to say about this situation. I did think that the prosecution's case was not strong enough. There was NO physical evidence tying Robert Blake to the murder. In a civil sense, on a balance of probabilities, he is most likely guilty, but he is not by a reasonable doubt. It is interesting to note that the credibility of prosecution witnesses was weak, so that in a nutshell allowed Mr. Blake to get away with murder. Then again, from all appearances, his wife was not a pillar of the community. I am not saying that she deserved to die, especially in that manner, it is just not such a shock. The lesson may be one of karma. You play "dirty", you may just die "dirty".

Keep looking up y'all!

Is it a new week?

I have returned. It has been an interesting weekend but I won't get into it. I guess I will. I had the great fortune to attend the wedding of a very good friend of mine here in Toronto. He is from Toronto but now lives in San Francisco. He had moved out west, Vancouver, about ten years ago. The funny thing is that he married a woman from Toronto. He had met her in the San Franscisco airport when they were both flying to Toronto.

I was quite happy for him and them. This was a guy I did not think would get married. He has had a life full of interesting experiences. He has spent a lot of time abroad. He has spent time in Japan, Korea, China, India, Thailand and South America. He has not spent much time, that I know of, in Europe. He is an avid rock climber and mountain trekker having trekked through Nepal during his Asian tour of 1988-1990.

The funniest thing, I found, about his wedding was that of all his friends, my wife and myself were the only ones from Toronto, who still reside in Toronto. We were at a table with people from the Bay area, Vancouver and somewhere in the US. I know his other table had folks from all over the US. I guess that says something about our friendship. I mean I have seen him when comes to Toronto, but he has NEVER seen or met my 8 year old son, which is something that I am not sure I understand. I do not see it as anything negative, it is more the fact that he is living his life and the he can find time for me when he is in, but not necessarily the time I would imagine or want.

Again, this is is not something I view as negative. It is what it is. He has always marched to his own drummer and I do as well, so I have a great admiration and respect for what he does, who he is and what he has become. I was the only person at the wedding, save for his family, that could say I knew him in high school. That is where we became friends and it continued through our university days. Even when he went off to school, after his second year at the University of Toronto, we stayed in touch and I visited him at the University of Western Ontario. The only year that I did not visit, was my first in law school during the 1986-7 school year.

I had not seen his family in over ten years. I had talked to his father as recently as about five years ago, but had not seen him since Dave moved to Vancouver in the summer of 1995. It was great to see his parents and sister again. I always enjoyed his family as they were and are warm and inviting people. His brother, Mark, who is a year younger, was a more difficult person for me to see. I was friends with Mark in his own right as well as part of a "team" with his brother Dave. They always seemed to get along, though I would say that Mark had the quicker wit, or at least the desire to speak up and make it known. They played well together.

I, somehow, due to indifference both mine and his, had not seen Mark since at least the early 90s. It was most certainly before I was married in 1993. I am not sure how that occurred but then again, I had let too many friendships sort of drift in that time. I would say it was a symptom of my own depression and finding solace, either alone or with people who were as miserable or moreso than I. I have learned that lesson and will continue to avoid the isolation trap as I continue my life journey.

I think that I am done with this entry. I do want to wish all the best and my support, for what it is worth, if and when things get tough, to David and Natalie. I would extend that to David's whole family as well. I have nothing but good things to say about these people and that is a testament to how they have ACTED in this life.

I should say that I did get to go out for dinner on Wednesday with David and Mark and Willie. It was Willie's first Dave sighting, let alone Mark, since at least 1995, though Dave had been in Toronto a number of times since he moved. The last I had SEEN Dave was September 13, 2001. I remember it because I sent him an email right after the towers collapsed on 9/11. He called me and told me he was in town, so we did lunch. I had not seen Mark and it was great to see him on Wednesday as well. I guess that is all that I want to say right now.

The Return

Howdy All, I am back! I guess that is obvious but I figure what is a little redundancy between friends? I think it is time for a little more "insanity".

I have had some great business ideas over the years. I am actually telling lies. These were ideas that I thought absurd but funny. They could fly.

People like to eat. People like to sweat. How else does one explain the use of saunas? I had this idea of combining the two. A Mexican restaurant in a sauna. This way you could combine eating and sweating. It is for the person on the go, who does not have the time to do both in a day. It could be a Szechuan restaurant in the sauna. The possibilities for this are endless. I mean picture people eating their meals in nothing but a towel. They are sweating and there is nothing quite so uncomfortable as sitting somewhere with damp or sweat soaked underwear. That is just asking for some good chafing and we all know how painful that can be. It would be like all the pain of chafing with none of the fun in getting chafed, if you know what I mean. If you do, please let me know, because I am not so sure that I know what I mean by that.

I have/had another idea that the "good" folks at PETA may find offensive. If I offend you, GOOD! That is almost the point, offend and force people to think the unimaginable or at least think, which given my observations of those around me, in general, is something that is not easily done. Here it is. It is a three part idea to revolutionize the fur trade. Set up game farms, be it minks or whatever. It is like good seafood restaurants where you go to the tank to choose your lobster. Here you choose your animals. Then to save money, you kill the beast, skin it and sew the pelts into a coat that you design. I figure there are many value additions here. We, as the owners, can do the killing, skinning, sewing and designing for a fee for each service. The value conscious or hands on types, just for the experience, can choose a more do it yourself plan which would be cheaper. I think it is like Kramer's idea of making your own pizzas only more offensive, bloodier and longer lasting, if done properly. What do you think? Let me know.

That is all for today. I will be back as soon as I can.

Let The Insanity Begin

I am back. I have decided to use this medium to say things, rant and rave, and go over my own history of absurd, but funny, ideas. Let me begin with these gems.

1. This is an observation. What is the deal with putting plastic over the furniture. I do not mean as a tarp when painting or sanding to protect it from dirt and dust. I am talking, or writing, about putting plastic covers on the cushions and the couch itself. It seems like a grandmother thing but I just cannot figure it out.

My grandmother had put those damn plastic covers on her couch and I could not figure out why. I mean, I can understand protecting it, but it was an ugly, orange floral pattern in a textured velour. What is/was she saving it for? Was this to be her last laugh? Haha, I am now dead but my children now have to deal with an ugly couch. As I think about it, I can see the humor. However, you are not laughing from the grave, Grandma.

The second part of this thing is why did my grandmother and parents insist that I sit on that plastic in the heat of summer. I liked to wear shorts as it was hot, but to make me sit, in a poorly air condtioned apartment, on plastic, so that my legs sweated and got stuck to the plastic. That was a cruel. It was like 2 older generations playing a prank on the youngest generation. Well, just you wait until we pack you both, at least my parents, in a home. I guess then I could hook the IV into their catheters and watch them piss themselves to death.

I was thinking that was a cruel thing to write on my part. It is and I would not do it, but the visual I get makes me laugh.

2. Wax Fruit. What kind of twisted fuck thought of wax fruit. I guess it becomes like having a mini-Mme Tussaud's in your own home. Who buys that shit? Other than my grandmother I mean. I do not want to go off on a familial rant, my grandmother has been dead for over ten years, so these observations are not recent.

Those are the thoughts for the day. I hope yoy have enjoyed them.

Just checking in

I am back, though this will be a short post. I wanted to get my first post in March done and this is it. Aren't you glad you came back for that? I can write, dripping with sarcasm, very well.

I do have some stuff to rant about, but I really do not have the time. I hope to get to some stuff tomorrow. Then again, you never know.