Below the Border

I am back. I apologize for not posting on Friday (Stinko, er Cinqo de Mayo or as we say in Canada, May 5th) as it was the date of our annual pilgramige to Western New York (Niagara Falls/ Buffalo and environs). It is a "trip" that the wife loves so I go along. I do like to stock up on cereal and grits. Going is always a great way to observe others in a different environment.

Anyway, the drive was non-eventful. We first stop at the Target in Niagara Falls, NY. It was there I saw two big haired women. One had that Marlo Thomas "That Girl" style without the flip up from the ends. I pointed it out to the wife (this is something that I noticed, I can point out the flaws in other women without being screamed at, but heaven forbid I should ogle a pretty one, then all hell breaks loose, so the lesson is I can look all I want, I just have to criticize them even when I find little to criticize--do I understand women, or at least "my" woman?). She tells me that I am wrong, but that the hairstyle does make the woman look wide. I take another look and figure it ain't the hairstyle making her look wide, but her wide ass. That is just me, but I do prefer the simple explanations.

I needed food and coffee as it was after noon. That meant a stop at Denny's, happy to say no shooting going on there, either. They had some interesting "new" stuff on the menu that I would like to try but I am compelled to have my old standby, Chicken/country fried steak and eggs. Again, I have to either thank Willie, or curse him, for the introduction and obsession with chicken fried steak and eggs. Man, it is good though. I am sure my life has been shortened by eating it, but it is worth it. It made the four cups of coffee go down well. It was even better because the wife's meal came with bacon AND sausage, so she gave one of each to me and the lad. He did not get around to eating his extra sausage and bacon, so I polished off his sausage while leaving the tip.

Anyway, shopping was a bore. The wife really found nothing. We took a turn in Burlington Crap, er Coat, Factory. I could comment on the clothes there but it would be the use of nasty words and I just do not want to go there, so use your imagination. They built a Fuddruckers around the Galleria and Burlington Crap Factory. The last time I was at a Fuddruckers was when there was one in Toronto about 21 years ago.

The location nearest us, at the time, was on Keele just south of Finch. It was in what I call the Bermuda Triangle of restaurants. All the restaurants that locate there, disappear. There was Pietro's (1978-80), Frank Vetere's (1981-1984), Fuddruckers (1985), Pat and Mario's.....Hooter's (2000) and now the Hooter's is gone and it is a funeral home, which is appropriate for all the restuarants that died and were buried there.

The Outlet Mall and the Galleria were DEAD. I could not believe it. I figure that with the strenght of the Canadian dollar vs the US dollar, the Outlet Mall should have been full of cars with Ontario license plates. It was not. Stores were "gone" and big one's too. That was the case for both malls. Oh well, it has nothing to do with me and I am really not much for mall culture (there is an oxymoron for you, then again it is a subculture, and a deviant one at that).

I was happy to come home. Though, I find that on all my forays into the US, I tend to push my caffeine levels to ultra high and feel no ill effects. It is that sleeping in a strange bed syndrome, that lets me fall asleep but it is a fitful one, or was it all the coffee, Dr. Pepper (it is medicinal because it has a Doctor's name) and Coke, I did not think of that before.

Well, that is all for right now. Ciao!