Anal Leakage

I am back. I have only two words for y'all "anal leakage". I guess it became more than two words, but "anal leakage" is quite an eye opener. I am not suffering from anal leakage, at least as far as you know, but the term popped into my head late yesterday afternoon. It must be the heat.

I have always thought it to be funny. Well, as long as it is not happening to me, or around me. It is the type of thing that works with pretty much all your senses, though for me the senses of touch and taste would be excluded (I do not know about you...and coprophiliacs out there?). For me there is the obvious sight, sound and smell (all none too pleasant).

The whole Oelestra thing (the "fat" designed to be so big so as not to pass into the body, making potato chips non fattening) cracked me up. Here you have a decidedly unhealthy population who would rather eat their fried and processed snacks than eat healthy foods and exercise being fed such fare by a number of corporations that make their money feeding crap to the masses. I am not advocating a ban on this stuff ala alcohol or tobacco. There is a large element of personal responsibility here and the best way to rid the world of this crap is to just demand better. In any event, P&G (I think) came up with this fat that the body could not absorb. All the better to fry crap in, or so they thought. The good folks who brought us the law of unintended consequences had their say. Not only does this stuff pass through you but it takes nutrients that you may have ingested, along with that bag of Doritios, out with it. Oh yeah, and the best part was this...that cramping sensation your feeling is going to lead to shit just sliding out of you. Sorry about that, but better bring a couple clean pairs of underwear and pants with you.

I mean nothing impresses the ladies more than having a pleasant conversation and then crapping your pants. Potato chip? As I think about it, if it was P&G who came up with Oelestra it may actually have been a brilliant, though backhanded, plan to sell more adult diapers (I think Depends is their brand, along with Pampers). If that was the case, more power to them. Get more fat folk in adult diapers, that way they do not have to expend energy getting up to crap. They can just sit there and go. Then again, the toilets are too small for these people (see a previous post from 2005 or 2006) and the toilet seats pinch their rather large asses.

As I am seeing it, this may have lead to a North American Sumo Culture. Anal leaking fat folks wearing adult diapers. They would look like fucking Sumo wrestlers. Well, without the funny hairdo, but both would be so fat as to have to wash themselves with a rag on a stick.

You know I did not want to do a post like this but this is what happens when two simple words just pop into my head while driving in the heat. Where the "anal leakage" came from I do not know, but I can see where it is going and I am getting off right here. It is my stop.

Enjoy the heat, enjoy the show. Ciao!