The final Dayton Chronicles Instalment

I am back. I decided to finish the damn Dayton story so I could get on to new business. Not that I have any, but.....I want to maintain that option.

I think I left off with the Wife's twit of an aunt, M, "dancing" and making quite the spectacle of herself. She really is something. Firmly grounded in her own fantasy world, oblivious to how she is perceived by others (not that is really a problem, it is just that she cannot "read" her audience--like she is autistic), it was quite a sight. Again, all I needed was the visual of her in spandex, doing her aerobics stepping, excuse me I have to go hurl.

Better. We came back to the hotel after the party. We had to be up to check out, go to my sister in law's for brunch, then hit the road. All that seemed easy, until we went outside. It was sunny and fucking cold. If it were that cold there, there was no telling how cold it would be back home. It was also really windy. My hands went numb putting our luggage and shit (we believe in carrying it around with us--it is a security thing) in the hatch. What was going on?

Brunch was uneventful. We were able to get on our way by about 11 or even earlier. By the time we got to my sister in law's, M had already left for the airport. I did not get to see her sunshiny face that morning. Yada Yada Yada, we were on our way.

It was pretty eventful in an uneventful way. I had to fight the car in the wind. We would be bathed in sunshine and then hit a patch of blowing snow. I am filling up the tank in Northern Ohio, my ears freezing, my hat in my pocket, when I go into pay. I put my hat on, just as the blowing snow kicks up (I am a bit of a moron, obviously). The skanky girl at the counter looks up and says its a "blizzard" and "I hate winter". I pipe in, "I am from Canada and that is no blizzard". She apologizes to which I say, "I am no fan of winter, especially this one (I do not mind winter in principle, it is in practice that I am not pleased) myself".

Back on the road and more of said same. Live to make it through Detroit and cross the border-no hassles. No bad weather between Windsor and London. I need gas and fill up. I go to clean the windshield and notice the fluid is a blue slush. That was how cold it was. Now, I am thinking about how much snow would I need to shovel when we arrive home.

Back in 2001 (early March), we flew to Dayton for similar festivities. It snowed the day we left and really snowed when we arrived. I remember carrying the luggage from the limo to the house mid shin deep in snow and then shovelling.

After some whiteout conditions near Woodstock, getting home was a breeze. There was the usual traffic. We made it home by six and I only had a little shovel to do.

That was the journey. Hope you enjoyed the re-tell. Gotta go. Ciao!